Revisions #2

I personally think that revisions is necessary to become better as a writer, or in any field that you pursue. I personally like to type or write and keep writing and leave it alone for awhile and then get back to it to revise. Often I feel that printing it out and then reading it over is much better then reading it on a screen where you typed it up, or better letting someone else revise it for you. In this revision process I looked at the grammar and style of my work along with the tenses and of course the flow of it. It helps me to read my work aloud so that I can hear how it sounds rather then read in my head how it sounds. Even though revisions can sometimes take forever, and your work ends up being cut down from 10pages to 2pages, I understand the importance of revision and how crucial it is in order to be a better writer.

Revisions...

When I first wrote my poems I didn't really think about tangibility and poetic devices and style. I just wrote what I felt, or what the topic was and I went on from there. I didn't think of how I could make it better because I thought since I wrote it that way then that's the way I wanted it to be.


Through my revision process I took out all the cliche's and I edited it and added punctuation marks. Some other comments that I got was to make my ode more abstract. One of my lines didn't really make sense with its next line so I made changes to that and made it more

Stories that I've told...

1. I don't know why we have all this snow. I mean one minute the sun is out and the next thing you know it's hailing. I really hate the weather!


2. So I called my mom to see how she was doing and all she could say to me was that I don't love her because I waited three days to call her. "Mom, I'm busy all the time," I responded, but of course she wasn't having it and continued to complain.


3. So I got a call from my best friend and her boyfriend was trying to hook me up with one of his friends. I think you should meet him first and then tell me how he acts so I can decide whether or not I want to give him my number or not. Of course my best friend's boyfriend rudely interrupts and says, "NO! you have to meet him first." But I really don't like meeting people without getting some sort of knowledge about them. Ughhh I guess I'll see him when we go out thursday.


4. (This is for my Resident Assistant Job). So I'm talking to my friend  James. So did you know that our bulletin boards are due at 4pm today. I didn't even start mine and I have no idea what I want to do. I know I want to do a black history month theme since it is black history month but I think that since our next bulletin board is due mid march then that'll be kind of weird. Oh well I'll just figure something out.


5. Isn't it crazy how one day can change your entire life. Now he's in jail because he couldn't control his temper. His sister was drunk and she came home yelling and screaming saying she was raped and of course he has a anger problem so he just went crazy. Even though you were closer to him I still feel for him because he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend and now he's locked up for 15 years to life. I can't believe someone so close to religion could be in jail. I guess young christians band is no more. Life's crazy girl!

I thought this was funny...

Stories I would like to Write

1. Non-Fiction
2. Romances
3. Drama (between families, friends, lovers)
4. Realistic Fiction
5. Mystery (murders and criminal) 

Giving my respect...

I can honestly say that I loved this book in highschool. I really enjoyed reading it and I can say that this is one of my favorite books! R.I.P J.D. Salinger 1919-2010. You left us with something really memorable and I thank you for writing this book.

UNTITLED

[This is a poem I wrote last year just fooling around...enjoy]

The dry, now wet bed made a tune with my damp, clammy skin

It felt like the springs from the bed vibrated from inside the cushions

Through my body, and popped open like a bottle of champagne.

I sprung up and it hit me.

It was a disease that infected me

My choice.

Stupidity which contributed to malfunction

You, A grotesquerie

Injecting me with seeds

Watering my roots with trickery

I sprouted up a plant from your misshapen garden

Now elderly,

Retarded from the rays of your unforgiving heat.

The day I met you I danced like an idiotic baboon

Leaping, urging to be released from the cage of restriction

Labeled “self control”

It’s that very cage that has me unconstrained,

Adrenalin running

While the drips from the rain kept me in tune

With the taps from my foot

Untamed and

Unhindered.

Sprinting through a field of bent roses